Water Blogged

2007-03-31T16:26:00.000-07:00

Webb here.
Cadets and fans may have been wondering where there beloved crime fighter had disappeared to. Unfortunately, I have been on a double secret, and totally hush, hush mission for which I am not allowed to discuss. Let's just say I was kicking butt and looking great while I did it. I regret to say that Janis, my aqua stylist died while accompanying me on this very perilous mission. She will be missed. One thing about my Janis, she knew the dangers that came with keeping me at my sexiest. I have requested a small shrine in her honor. If it passes through congress, it will erected on her home planet of Nexxus. It's actually a bust of me, but my hair looks as though she had just styled it. It's what she would have wanted. Not to worry though fans, I have my back up stylist Reggie and he is almost as good as Janis was. I wish I could tell you about the mission, but it is the future and we wouldn't want to muck that up now would we? I promise to blog more as I am now on aqua r&r for the next month. Rusty is in spring camp and writes me often. He'll be back in a few days, and thank goodness cause the ship needs a good cleaning. It'll be fun, he can make a day of it. Well friends, I am off for my midday rub down and some aqua tequila.
Remember, sieze the day and by force if necessary!

Webb Out!

2007-02-15T13:59:00.000-08:00

Dear Website Surfing Person,

This is Agent Adrian Drinkwater with the Underwater Revenue Service (URS). After reviewing the Aqua Rangers tax returns for the past 10 years, we have noticed several glaringly obvious fraudulent items. Here are just a few of these erroneous accounts:

1. Mr. Webb Torpedo consistently labeled his arms and legs as dependents.
2. Mr. Rusty Bolts wrote off his comic books as educational expenses.
3. Mr. Torpedo put his reflection on the pay roll as a "spy" in another dimension.
4. Mr. Torpedo wrote off several Aqua Video Phone calls to a Miss Flo Tation.
5. Mr. Bolts acme cream was put on the aqua-health insurance.

There are many other false claims, and as a result the Aqua Rangers owe the URS quite a large sum of clams, as it were.

They have urged me to plead with their fans to buy a copy of their exploits on DVD to help raise the money that they owe us so we will not impound their ship.

Please view the 5 episodes that are now up in the "episodes" section of this very site and if at that time interest has been peaked make your way to the merchandise section.

Thank you for your time,
URS Agent Adrian Drinkwater

2006-12-05T12:24:00.000-08:00

Rusty Here,

Great news Aqua-Cadets! The Aqua Rangers will be appearing in audio form on Fan Boy Radio this coming Sunday, December 10th.

We will be talking about all sorts of cool stuff so be sure to tune in!

Also, be sure and order your Aqua Rangers DVD now, so you can get them in time for the Aqua-Holiday. Nothing says holiday spirit like curling up in front of a warm aqua-video screen with your loved ones or your cats, and enjoying the amazing adventures of your favorite underwater heroes.

They make great stalking stuffers. And by that I mean if someone is stalking you, you can stuff a DVD down their throats to debilitate them. The Aqua Rangers save lives!

Rusty Out

2006-11-16T12:49:00.000-08:00

Aqua Historical Society

Aqua Greetings from the way, way, far away future! I am Elder 471-blue XL. I am the curator of the Aqua Historical Society's Media Library. It's not the most exciting job, but I'm not "good" with people. Being alone here in this basement all day is really the best thing for me. It gets lonely sometimes, but a little loneliness is ten times better than 3 aqua nights in the Aqua Pain Dome for biting some ones ear off because I "thought" he was looking at me funny.

Anyhoo, I'm sending this Time Blog from the future to the past in order to inform all of you Landites about an upcoming very special aqua-time-broadcast. Starting on November 20th, 2006, I will be sending an aqua-time-broadcast of one of the many historical episodes of the adventures of the long dead Aqua Rangers. This is merely for educational purposes.

Subsequent episodes will follow in the coming weeks. Please use these historical records for edification about the future. There is nothing you can do to change the eminent destruction of the universe, so you might as well get a glimpse of what happens after the smoke clears. Besides most of you will be killed in the giant tidal wave, so this should be a real hoot for you guys.

Aqua thanks and please tell all you know to tune in for this and future aqua-time-broadcasts.

Aqua-Goodbye,
Elder 471-blue XL
Curator Media Library
Aqua Historical Society

2006-11-09T13:23:00.000-08:00

Rusty Here,

Boy oh boy, there's nothing worse than zombie dolphins! Not only are the smart and fast, but they want to eat your brain. Well, my brain is staying right here! (I'm pointing at my head)

We stumbled into a school of those things on a routine patrol of aqua-quadrant 14 just outside the Liquidia Galaxy. Zombie dolphins are especially dangerous because they are so darn cute. They trick you by acting like some one is in trouble, then when you go outside of your ship they attack! With the swiftness of an aqua-ballerina and the tenacity of a frisky priest after boys choir practice.

It took forever to convince Webb that they weren't regular dolphins. He tried to go outside like 15 times, even after we watched them devour several whales. It didn't help that Webb had been drinking a lot of his special energy drink out of his aqua-flask all day.

The only way to kill a zombie dolphin is to shove a stick of aqua-dynamite into it's blow hole. It's messy, but effective.

After taking care of all the zombie dolphins, I tucked Webb into bed and read him his favorite bedtime story. I have to go now, the aqua-Sears and Roebucks catalog just got here and I want to go to my room by myself and look at the bras and pant..... I mean the aqua-televisions.

Rusty Out

2006-10-31T17:21:00.000-08:00

Webb Here.
Cadets, I just wanted you all to know that I have been very busy lately and unable to get to my blogging "obligations". Well, not realy obligation, as I am not paid for my time or even that fond of doing it. But when a little boy came up to me on the aquastreet yesterday in tears and asking why I hated him and all the cadets because I wasn't writing them, I pushed him out of the way and ran home to write this very blog. You see kids, sometimes a man meets someone they like very much and they want to be them a lot. All they want to do is spend time with them. Maybe in a private room with just their love and a bottle of aquavodka and some dvd's. Well, all that has changed. She turned out to be a not very nice person. You could say quite evil. She almost made this crime fighter believe that all women are more evil than I ever suspected. I have to say it was this first time I got the "I need my space" aquaroutine. For someone like myself who has more courage and strength than any of you, it was a new and painful experience. Even more so then the time I rescued Rusty from the clutches of a deadly manta-leopard not realizing I was wearing my new steak belt. It's all behind me now and I am back, free of the she cluthes I was under and more soberer than I have been in months. Thank you for understanding and keep those fan club dues and letters coming.

Be kind to your nieghbors (unless they keep callng the cops when you have a few friends over)
Webb out!

2006-10-18T08:36:00.000-07:00

Rusty Here,

This past week has been terrible. You'd think we were used to it by now, but every time it happens it catches us off guard.

Every month we are attacked by an evil menace. He used to be a scientist working in the field of aqua-time space displacement rays. He had a mishap in the lab that simultaneously turned him into a mad man bent on aqua-domination, and threw him into a temporal time vortex that causes him to only appear on our dimensional plane for about 3 to 5 days every month.

He calles himself Mr. Monthly. Every time he pops into existence he attacks us with his latest scheme to take over the Aquaverse. He's so emotional. One minute his screaming at us, the next minute he's crying over the silliest thing. We hate his little visits. No matter how much we try to fight his assaults it seems like nothing we do stops him. He blames us for everything.

We tried plugging up the vortex that he comes through every month with a sort of liner, but that just irritated him. We even offered him medication that might help his fragile mental state, but that just mad him madder.

I guess Webb and I are stuck with our monthly visitor.

Rusty Out

2006-10-16T11:15:00.000-07:00

Ralph here,

Hey, this is Ralph. I'm the tech guy at the Aqua Federation of Justness. I do all the aqua-web stuff for the Federation. I'm the guy that figured out how to open a worm hole from the future into the past through the aqua-internet. That's what makes it possible for you to look at this aqua-website right now. I'm a freakin' bad ass if you haven't guessed by now. And I'm available, if any of you ladies out there want to contact me. My mom says I'm really handsome.

Anyway I just wanted to say, I decided to revamp the boys aqua-website. I hope you enjoy the new look. There are still some kinks in the aqua-armor, but I'm ironing them out as I find them. Did I mention I'm a tecnical bad ass wizard?

I'm going to start putting up episodes from Webb and Rusty's life, so watch for those soon.

My e-mail is ultramegacooldude_4584@yahoo.com if any of you hot babes what to chat online with a bad ass. Just not during reruns of Aqua Trek on the Sci-Fi channel or on Tuesday nights from 7-10pm, that's my Aqua D&D night. And also don't call my house after 9pm, or you'll wake up mother.

Later,
Ralph
Supreme Tech Overlord

2006-10-13T09:39:00.000-07:00

Rusty here,

The Aqua Federation of Justness sent us an aqua-memo that stated we have to start daqua-menting our missions and the daily activities on Goldie 3. They said it was so they could better aid us in fighting evil, but I think it's for tax reasons.

Anyway, here is my first "Water Blogged" entry. Not much to report today. It was a pretty normal day, you know, attacked by hideous sea monster around noon. Clean hideous sea monster guts off outside of ship around 1:23pm. Tell Webb he's a good captain and that his hair looks nice from 3pm to 5:12pm. Attacked in a fit of revenge by the first hideous sea monster's mate 6pm. Clean ship off again 7:04pm. Finally read Webb a bedtime story and tuck him in around 10pm.

That's about it for now,
Rusty Aqua-Out